07.18.2025

Sometimes when I’m playing guitar I get this feeling.

This feeling reminds me of Dostoevsky’s The Idiot, when Prince Mishkin is going to have an epileptic episode.

The sound sounds so beautiful I almost feel like I’m going to faint. It’s a sound so lovely and my fingers also feel it and my brain is actively processing it and I stop breathing and I’m just existing in the sound.

Thankfully I rarely faint but it is a very strange, overwhelming feeling that I can’t stop from happening.

The only way I could prevent it from happening is if I didn’t try to play well har har.

I can’t even do that (I haven’t tried).

Well, today it happened and it was weird but the specific moment when it happened I felt like I was 2 people playing the same guitar. I felt like a small orchestra. 12 string guitars only make it worse too, maybe it feels like I’m 4 players.

I don’t know.

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